Wienerschnitzel Officially Sucks

Ok, we’re through the looking glass. Wienerschnitzel is officially refusing to give us any interviews on camera, or cooperate with our film in any way whatsoever. Why? Because I had this picture on our website…


...as well as another pic of me getting my stitches out. Wienerschnitzel's PR flacks said they are concerned that I won’t reflect well on their “family values”. I explained to their PR people that the first photo I don’t even own – I posted it because I thought it was cute (it is), and the second was for my friends who wanted to see the stitches in my arm. Neither is destined for the film, and my site gets 10 hits a day (at most) - from blood relatives. My pleas fell on deaf ears.

The more I think about it, the angrier I get. “Wienerschnitzel has wholesome values and an image we need to uphold”??? Wha...wholesome??? You feed kids hotdogs…

Here’s what Wikipedia says about hotdogs…

• Hot dogs are generally regarded as unhealthy insofar as most have high sodium, fat and nitrate content. Contents can also be questionable, with cheaper types of hot dogs having been known to contain snouts, ears and organ meat blended.

Hmmm, I guess those high moral values involve feeding kids wholesome fatty chili-covered crap. For the record, I DO NOT ENDORSE GIVING WIENER DOG PUPPIES BEER OR SMOKES. Wait until they are 3 years old, the legal wiener dog age of consent, and even then only let them drink if they're REALLY Jonesing. I guess what I'm trying to say is "moderation" people...

Back to reality, I suspect the *real* reasons Wienerschnitzel won’t speak to me are:

1. They seemed to be very panicked at the 2004 party that we *may* have filmed a couple of their executives drinking (but not drunk). Gee, drinking at a party - not exactly a scandal... I promised that we would not use any footage of people drinking – but that didn’t seem to satisfy them.
   
   
2. They were also (or so they say) unaware that the Dachshund Club of America is officially opposed to wiener dog races for a variety of reasons. I had told Wienerschnitzel that I’d like to get their side of the story. They have declined. Fine. I guess I’ll tell their side for them.

Seems pretty bizarre (and pathetic) that a company that sponsors an event won't go on camera to speak about said event. What the hell are they hiding? It's WIENER DOG RACING!!! How controversial can it be??? Corporate America is running scared and I blame Michael Moore and Morgan Spurlock - they've ruined it for the rest of us documentary filmmakers! Dammit Mike and Morgan, you owe me!!!